ToT: KIT (a.k.a. Keep In Touch)

This week on ToT I just wanted to see how many acronyms I could use in the title of this post.  Just kidding! This week we are talking about how we stay in touch with our friends. Do you email, phone, skype, or text.  Do you set up girls weekends or dinners out? Do you still have friends from high school and college, or are your friends people that you have met in adulthood? How do you keep long lasting friendships?

I am very fortunate to have many wonderful friends in my life.  I think I have a great mix of people that I would call my friends.  Some of them I met in elementary school (and we still keep in touch), some of them I met in high school, some in college, and even a few I met in adulthood.  I always joke that I live on "Wisteria Lane" with out the drama of affairs and murders, but it's true-I'm so lucky to be able to live next to some wonderful people that I don't just call my neighbors, but friends as well. My parents have always had a hard time trying to keep up with who my friends are (maybe because a lot of them were named Laura-lol.), but I consider having a lot of friends a good problem to have.

Where my girls at? A lot of you who read this blog are my good friends, and you know who you are-but some of you may not know about the other friends I have in my life.  Don't worry, I'm not going to go through a dissertation of each and every friend I have here.  First, it might be quite boring for some of you, and second, I don't want to hurt any one's feelings by accidentally leaving someone out. I just want to give you a little bit of an idea of a few of the "groups" of friends I have, and how those friends and I try to stay in touch. 

 There is a group of 3 girls that I met in 5th grade that I still hang out with on a regular basis.  We weren't always close all the time.  You know how adolescent girls can be-we used to fight and bicker over just about everything. When a new milestone in life would approach we could almost feel the spin of the world pulling at us to grow up and apart.  I can remember when we were playing on the playground in 6th grade. It was the end of the school year, and one of our last recesses.  We knew there would be no recess in Junior high, and our close knit little bubble would soon burst with new friends and experiences. It was a sad and exciting time. Although we did go our different directions, somehow, after college we all found each other again. Some of us hadn't talked in years, and some of us had talked to each other almost every day.  When we came back together it was like no time had passed at all.  I think that is amazing.  There is a great comfort in that.  It's always fun to make new friends, but at the same time, there is something special of knowing someone for so long that they know your history-heck they are a part of it. They knew you when you were 10 and they know you now. You grew up together.  Anyways, before the waterworks start, these girls and I mostly keep in touch through a monthly or bi-monthly dinner.  It's been tough because we literally live on all four sides of town, and now we all have kids.  Email, calling, and texting have also worked to help us keep in touch in between those much anticipated mom's night out dinners. 

This is me with one of the 5th grade friends in junior high.

This is Danielle (My Peaches and Cream) and I at our Senior Dinner in High School.

I have another group of friends that I know from high school, too.  This group didn't really start to hang out until the last couple of years of high school.  One girl and I had known each other since 3rd grade.  We were pretty close then because we were so very similar.  She and I were both extremely shy and soft spoken, and we always joke that the only reason we were friends was because her last name ended with a W and mine a Z so we had to sit next to each other a lot.  We were all pulled together by a shared sport, and that experience bonded us for life.  Even though we only knew each other for a short period of time before we all went our separate ways in college, we formed such a close link that when we get together now it's as though no time has passed.  It's that whole history of having a shared growing experience feeling again with this group. We mostly stay in touch through email and phone conversations or texting.  We try to see each other over the holidays every year, and we have been to each other's weddings and baby showers as well.  I know a lot of people hate to use Facebook to keep in touch, but I love getting on there to see if one of these girls has posted any new pictures because she lives so far away from me that we don't always get to talk often.



These are some more of the friends mentioned above.

Some friends that I have are friends that I share with my husband.  I met these friends during my "adulthood" (I don't know why, but that word just sounds funny to me-like I should not be using it to describe myself. lol).  There are just some people that are easy to be around.  They love me and my family, and vice versa.  Some of them are my neighbors.  It's so much fun to be able to just walk out the front door to see who is out and about.  It's a great thing when I just need someone to talk to for some adult interaction, to share a joke, or a funny story about something the kids did.  It's nice to have someone around when I have a problem, and I need immediate advice. Even though we don't have a "shared" history per se, we have an instant bond.  I know I can trust these people.  They have my best interest in mind as my friends, and I have theirs as well.  Some of my neighbors and I go out once a month to one of our favorite restaurants just to get out of the hood for a bit, and that has been a really great experience. 

A couple of my other "adulthood" friends were co-workers. Sometimes you meet a person, and it's almost like dejavou-you feel like you have met them before or known them your entire life.  That is how I would describe my relationship with these friends.  Seriously, one person I met at work I really felt like I had known before.  We have been close friends ever since. The other friend I worked with was actually my friend before we worked together.  She helped me to get a job, and that experience drew us closer together than we were before.  We still see each other all the time even though we don't work together anymore.  We share a lot of the same interests, and I'm always asking for her advice on things.

Okay, I know this is getting long winded, but I would be completely remiss if I did not mention a little something about a very special friend that I have (not my husband who by the way is also a very special friend, but will be written about in length in a future spouse post coming up). This person that I'm writing about was my other half before I got married.  I know that may sound strange, and I do not mean that in a romantic way at all.  We have shared so many experiences and grown up together in such a close way that we describe each other as sisters at heart.  I can honestly say that I'm not sure I would be the person I am today or had many of the cherished experiences in my life if it had not been for this person.  She has always pushed me to grow, given me support when I needed it, and been there even if distance, or time was pushing us a part. She has seen me at my best and worst and loved me no matter what. My dad is so impressed by this friend, and reminds me all the time of how friendships like ours are very rare.  There is a story he says that will stick with him forever about the kind of friend she has been to me, and I would like to share it (I wonder if she even remembers it).  I know this post is long, but bear with me here.  I was working at the library at DePauw, and my shift just ended.  It was cold outside and pouring buckets of rain.  Not relishing the long walk back to my dorm with no umbrella, I tried to call my friend's dorm room (and everyone on our floor for that matter) to see if someone could bring me an umbrella (because no one had a car that could give me a ride back). The phone rang and rang with out an answer, and I resigned myself to the fact that I was going to have a cold and wet walk home. When I came up the stairs to the exit of the library, there was my friend with an umbrella in hand and a huge smile on her face.  She didn't need to be asked, she was already there, just like she had always been there for me in a time of need. Although we both have our own families now, live on different sides of town, and get caught up in our own busy lives, I know, that should any storm clouds appear on the horizon of life, she will be there for me with an umbrella in hand and a warm smile on her face.

This is my BFF and I at our Freshman Year Awards Banquet.  Check out my suit!!

Now, go call your BFF, and check out what Danielle, Charlotte, Nancy, and Sarah have to say about their friends.